ADHD as a Woman: Embracing the Chaos and Finding Your Rhythm
Welcome to She Thrives with Stef Barti, a podcast dedicated to empowering women to live their best lives and thrive unapologetically.
This blog post is based on Episode 35 of my podcast, She Thrives with Stef Barti. If you prefer to listen, you can check out the original podcast episode.
As women, we wear so many hats every day—careers, relationships, personal growth, and so much more.
For some of us, this juggling act is even more challenging due to ADHD.
In this post, I’ll share some of the struggles I face as a woman with ADHD—both the challenges and the ways I’ve learned to work with them, not against them.
Embracing the Chaos of Everyday Life
Living with ADHD, especially as a woman, can often feel like a constant battle against chaos.
We’re told to “just get organized” or “stick to a routine,” but for someone with ADHD, these things aren’t always as easy as they sound.
One of my biggest challenges is managing the small administrative tasks of daily life—things like paying bills, managing paperwork, and even simple things like laundry.
I’m sure many of you can relate to the mountain of laundry that never seems to go away.😩
Some days, I’m on top of it, knocking out load after load like a pro. Other days, it’s a different story—laundry piles up, and I forget to take it out of the washing machine or dryer. And when that happens, I can feel like I’m failing.🥹
To deal with this, I rely heavily on alarms.
My phone rings constantly with reminders for almost everything. Still, even with all these alerts, I sometimes struggle to take action in time.
ADHD often feels like being in a constant race against yourself.
Pro Tip: If you struggle with laundry (or other repetitive tasks), try setting multiple reminders throughout the day. It might take a few tries, but don’t be hard on yourself—it’s progress, not perfection.☺️
The Impulsivity Struggle
Another challenge I face with ADHD is impulsivity.
While some women with ADHD experience inattention, for me, it’s mostly hyperactivity.
One of my sometimes problematic outlets for my hyperactive mind has historically been impulsive spending.
It used to be a real issue for me, but over time, I’ve learned to control it.
The key? Giving myself a budget for impulsive purchases.
Yes, you heard me right—I set aside money specifically for the things I might buy on a whim.
This has helped me find a balance between my love for spontaneity and being financially responsible.
If you’re someone who struggles with impulsive purchases (hello, shiny object syndrome!), I suggest creating a “waitlist.”
For example, when I feel the urge to buy something, I put it in my phone’s notes app and wait at least 30 days before I buy it.
This has helped me differentiate between true needs and temporary desires.
Money and ADHD: It’s a Work in Progress
When it comes to managing money, ADHD can be a challenge.
I had to start budgeting seriously because I realized that money doesn’t grow on trees 🤭 -and I wasn’t being as mindful about my spending as I should have been.
If you’re into adventures, find ways to budget for them that make sense for your life and priorities.
And don’t forget—there are always alternatives.
One of the things I’ve been working on recently is organizing a small women’s dance retreat, which I’m super excited about!
I find that connecting with other women, moving, and dancing is an incredible way to bond and heal.
It’s one of my top priorities, and I’m thrilled to be offering this as a way to bring like-minded women together. You can join the Thriving girlies newsletter to stay on the loop.🫶🏾
Classic ADHD behaviour 😅
Anyways back to those tips 🤭
& who cares it’s only 9 AM?
Creating Structure to Navigate Chaos
Despite my ADHD, I’ve learned to love structure.
It’s not about being rigid—it’s about creating a rhythm that works for me.
Whether it’s creating a simple routine at home or planning my travel schedule, structure gives me the ability to focus and reduce anxiety.
One of my favourite tips for staying organized is writing everything down.
I plan my content, my social media posts, and even my workouts ahead of time.
This helps me keep track of everything and avoid decision fatigue—because let’s face it, ADHD can make even the smallest decision feel overwhelming.
I’m also a fan of staying consistent with a few things. For example, I eat the same meals every day.
Not only does it simplify my life, but it also frees up mental energy for the things that truly matter.
Automating the small stuff lets me focus on what’s important, whether it’s a project I’m passionate about or simply taking a much-needed break.
The Power of Planning Ahead
I’m a big fan of planning ahead because it allows me to avoid the chaos that often accompanies last-minute decision-making.
For me, it’s about managing my schedule, knowing when I’m free, and understanding when I need to make space for self-care.
One way I tackle this is by setting aside time on the weekend to plan out my upcoming week. I use this time to schedule content for my blog, plan for YouTube videos, and even block out time for social activities or self-care.
It gives me a clear picture of what’s ahead, and when I wake up in the morning, I don’t feel overwhelmed. Everything is already set, and I can just show up, follow the plan and do the work.
Embracing the ADHD Chaos
Here’s the thing: ADHD doesn’t have to be a curse.
Yes, it’s chaotic.
Yes, it’s challenging.
But it’s also a part of who I am, and I’ve learned to embrace it. I’ve stopped worrying about niching down and sticking to just one thing.
I’m all over the place, and that’s perfectly okay.
Whether it’s this podcast, my YouTube channel, or my social media, I’m not afraid to talk about all the things that excite me.
If there’s one thing I’ve learned, it’s that we don’t need to fit into someone else’s box—we get to create our own! 💕
So, if you’re like me, embracing the chaos can be empowering. Don’t try to be perfect—just show up, do your best, and enjoy the ride.
Stef Barti
Host of She Thrives with Stef Barti Podcast
Feel free to share this post with anyone who might benefit from it. And remember, you are a unique, beautiful creation, worthy of love and joy every day of the year.
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If you’re a woman looking to connect with a community of like-minded souls exploring wellness, somatic healing, movement and dance, spirituality, and adventure, come join me on Instagram! My profile is private as I’m hoping to create a safe and supportive space for us to grow together. You’ll find me @StefBarti—let’s embark on this journey together. 🌿
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Additional Resource to help you slow down
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I created my “Unleash your Feminine Power” to help you really start diving into your own unique power.
In this course, you will learn to connect with your body through some very sensual movements.
There is no fancy choreography to worry about. I really wanted to make this as simple as possible.
The goal is to give you a somatic practice that you can implement into your daily routine in order to start embodying your authentic self.
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And this is the goal of my ” Unleash your Feminine Power“.
The beautiful thing is that once you start getting in touch with that fire within, it only grows from there.
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ps. Don’t forget to join the conversation over on the podcast and the girlies club so you don’t miss anything 🫶🏾
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Women Self Love Wellness Retreat
I am so passionate about women empowerment. Everything I do is based on this. I want to see more women embrace their authentic selves. Trust me life gets so much better.
That’s the main focus of my self love women retreat. In this Wellness retreat, we go deep. I really love to connect with my fellow sisters.
That’s why I only do small groups of 10-12 women.
This retreat is an invitation to embody your feminine and to dive into radical self love. Growth and shedding past limiting beliefs is the focal point.
We do this through various workshops, wellness practices such as breath work and lots of somatic movement.
As a dance teacher, of course we will also be using the power of dance and music to process, release and shed things that are holding us back so we can be born again.
Welcome to our transformational retreat where the focus is all on YOU.
Not only that, but we do it in style and comfort.
Our next retreat is in a breathtaking villa on the beautiful island of Gozo Malta. We will be staying in our own private villa.
And did I mention our own private chef? with our own private pool 🤭.
It is the perfect time to slow down and prioritize yourself.
Also, don’t forget to stay in touch for my Bali self love women wellness retreat, for pure feminine embodiment and lots of dancing also.
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